Keone Kela’s Rotator Cuff Unhappy with Move to Pittsburgh

Early Tuesday morning, the Pirates clubhouse was busy at work.  In a prudent, energizing and unfortunately, shocking move, Pirates GM Neal Huntington acquired viable bullpen pitcher, Keone Kela in exchange for prospect Taylor Hearn.  Fans in Pittsburgh are excited that management has moved away from their “build for the future” mentality, to one of “win now.”

However, not everyone is happy about this trade.  Kela’s Rotator Cuff expressed extreme displeasure with the trade.  “I’m not going,” Kela’s rotator cuff wrote on Twitter early this morning.  “Straight up.  He’ll have to do it without me. #NoColdWeather.”  The tweet has been removed.


There is a track record of players body parts revolting against trades that they didn’t favor.  Two notable instances were when Kyrie Irving’s knee refused to be traded to the Boston Celtics this past year and when Marian Hossa’s MCL decided it would rather remain an Atlanta Thrasher than move to the rebuilding Pittsburgh Penguins in 2008.

When reached for comment Kela’s agent said that “Often times athletes have disagreements with their individual body parts.  It’s nothing new.  Keone is excited to be a Pirate.  I’m sure his rotator cuff will shortly come to understand that Pittsburgh is a great baseball town with a good family atmosphere.”