French Gift

Give me your tired, your poor,
Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free,
The wretched refuse of your teeming shore.”

French Politician #1 : You know who I can’t stand?

French Politician #2: The Dutch?

French Politician #1: Yes, but who else?

French Politician #2: The English, the Welsh, the Germans, the Russians, the Bulgarians, most Algerians?

French Politician #1: Yes to all of those, but America is really annoying me lately.

French Politician #2: Oh, I know!  They’re so full of themselves.  They get one Constitutional Democracy up and running and think they are all that.

French Politician #1: You know what would be funny?

French Politician #2: Jerry Lewis marathon?

French Politician #1: No.  Let’s send them a gag gift!

French Politician #2: That’s hilarious, like what?

French Politician #1: What about like a big, bright, expensive copper statue?

French Politician #2: Lol.  They’re just getting their country started.  Where the heck are they going to put that?

French Politician #1: That’s the beauty, they’ll feel socially obligated to put it somewhere prominent like a coastline or a bay or something.  But it will look ridiculous!

French Politician #2: Doesn’t bright copper turn a nasty green when it’s near water?

French Politician #1: Lol.  Yes!  That’s the joke.

French Politician #2: You know what we could do too?

French Politician #1: What?

French Politician #2: We could put an inscription on it that basically invites all the worst people in the world to go to America.

French Politician #1: Sacré bleu!  Those idiots will probably think it’s a metaphor of how they’re a beacon of freedom, but in reality, it’s an advertisement for scumbags of all nationalities, religions, and ethnicities to rent apartments there!

French Politician #2: How will we pay for this?

French Politician #1: We’ll keep telling America that we’re almost done with it but we ran out of money and those ding-dongs will pay for it themselves!


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