The Emperor’s New Robe

A recent New York Times article characterized Donald Trump as a lone wolf who roams the halls of the White House wearing a bathrobe.  Thus a meme was started.

I personally don’t see what the big deal is.  Robes are about as the most laid back piece of clothing you can wear.  Now, if Trump was wearing a Snuggle around, then I’d say we have a problem.

Don’t you want the leader of the free world to be relaxed?  You don’t want him anxiously pacing back and forth chain smoking over every little issue.  “Christ, what are we going to do about the drapes in here!?!”  No.  You want him at ease.  “Hey, man.  There’s plenty more Navy Seals where that came from.  Let’s all just chill.”

The greatest leaders were the ones that were relaxed.  Winston Churchill got out of bed at 11:00 AM, read the newspaper, took a bath, drank a whiskey and soda, ate lunch for two hours, fed the ducks, worked for a about an hour and fifteen minutes, took a nap, woke up, another whiskey and soda, ate dinner, played cards, and went to bed.  And he wrote 50 books, beat Hitler, and won a Nobel Peace prize!  So I don’t really think a robe is anything to worry about.

Trump is an elderly man with a young wife who has posed nude in print.  Now he’s wearing a robe around.  Is he trying to turn the White House into the Playboy Mansion?  Pretty soon David Spade and Fred Durst are going to be walking around trying to get laid in the Rose Garden.

The robe is a truly distinct piece of clothing though.  On any given day, if you’re wearing a robe, you’re either filthy rich or dirt poor.  Because in either case, you don’t really have jack to do.   You either sit on your ass and eat junk food or sit on your ass and trade junk bonds.

Abe Lincoln had the stovepipe hat.  George Washington had the powdered wig.  Bill Clinton had Umbro Jogging shorts. So it is with this in mind that I declare the robe the official garment of the Trump Presidency!



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