Cherry Hill, NJ – As they finished their respective meals, a large group of friends watched in horror yesterday as their waitress at the Cheesecake Factory on Haddonfield Road came out of the back room with just one check. The jovial tone of the party, which had heretofore not considered exactly how they’d be paying for the meal, turned quickly into sheer and utter dread as the server dropped off one singular, solitary bill.
Agreeing that they probably should have said something at the beginning of the meal, the group hurriedly raced to organize their money and elect a leader to shepard them through the harrowing ordeal set before them. A panicked Paul Cowens, junior financial analyst at a local Bank of America branch, began to experience shortness of breath and heart palpitations knowing he’d likely get saddled the responsibility of collecting payments from everyone because they assumed he was “good with numbers.”
When asked if she could go back and split the checks up, the waitress explained that it was physically and morally impossible because it was “already in the computer.”