Study: Andy Dalton’s Hair Contains Astronomical Levels of Beta-Carotine

Dayton, OH – Researchers at the the University of Dayton have announced a breakthrough revelation in the nutritional field.  “After intensive testing, we have discovered that Andy Dalton’s hair may be an untapped resource for gigantic levels of the organic compound beta-carotine,” said Dr. Andrew Munhall.  “This discovery may lead to a nutritional watershed moment where the vitamin deficiencies which cause vision problems, skin abnormalities or frequent bodily infections may be a thing of the past for humanity.”

Beta-carotene belongs to a group of provitamins which are related to vitamin A, called carotenoids. Their reddish-violet pigment imparts color to many edible plants.  The study shows that three strands of the Cincinnati Bengals quarterback’s hair may contain as much beta-carotene as 40 carrots, 13 medium-sized pumpkins or 25 sweet potatoes.

The University has partnered with SportClips as part of a new mission to rid the world of cataracts.  Dr. Munhall explained, “The trade-off of course is getting a large population to eat Andy Dalton’s hair.

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