American Pot Slams Russian Kettle

Kiev, Ukraine – During a diplomatic trip to the embattled country of Ukraine, a high-ranking American Pot slammed the tactics of a Russian Kettle, calling it “the blackest thing I’ve ever seen.”

Tensions have been high between the US and Russia in the past few weeks, with the US viewing Russia’s encroachment into the semi-autonomous region of Crimea as an act of aggression.

“You invaded a sovereign country!” claimed the US Kettle, which was made in Pennsylvania.

“So did you!” the Russian Kettle exclaimed.

“You are an international bully,” stated the American Pot.

“You are!” replied the Russian Kettle.


The German Roaster Pan and the British Baking Crock echoed the American Pot’s comments saying that “intentionally invading a free country with plans to install governments friendly to your own is both morally reprehensible and completely indefensible.”

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