Fearless Stand-up Comedian Courageously Denigrates his Wife in Front of Strangers

(Baltimore, MD) Last night, local comedian Jason Orvis courageously crapped all over his wife during his six-minute set at Murphy’s Pub Open Mic.  Orvis wowed the audience with embarrassing tales of his marriage and pulled no punches while speaking ill on his loving, faithful wife.

“He was just so brave,” recalled Blake Tommi, who was in attendance.  “He just opened his soul and shared some of the most intimate secrets of his married life.”  Topics included how his wife makes him earn an income to pay for family necessities, how she asks for his attention sometimes, and how she doesn’t like the fact that he binge drinks 6 nights out of the week.  “It really took some artistic integrity to go up there in front of those random strangers and repeatedly insult the mother of his children,” Tommi added.

The mesmerizing set, in which Orvis chose to reveal the deepest secrets of his marriage to a group of down and out drunks, sad loners, and distracted sports fans, was clearly a brazen attempt to bring honor to the art form of comedy.  By loudly besmirching the name of the woman he had vowed to protect and care for in front of God himself, Orvis was able to gain small, incremental laughs from the paltry crowd of distracted onlookers who in the grand scheme of things, don’t matter at all. 

“It went really well,” said Orvis, minutes after viciously slurring his wife’s honor.  “I got like, six new Twitter followers.”

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